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I just completed my Bachelor of Social Work but don't at all feel like I am/am capable of being a social worker. So instead I fill my time with love, baking, tea, sewing, activism, vegetarianism, politics, my friends, being hyper emotional/an emotional masochist and watching tv shows and movies.
I recently moved to melbourne so most of what I post these days is about how much I miss my Love. Yep.
I haven’t been this sad and disappointed in quite a long time.
I applied for pretty much my dream job and it was pretty close to Melbourne. I applied on Friday, found out on Monday that I had an interview, my referees were called on Tuesday and I had a Skype interview on wednesday (yesterday).
I felt really good about the interview even though I didn’t think I answered 100% of the questions with 100% of the information they wanted.
I found out today that I didn’t get the job. I came in third and I’m pretty sure they only interviewed 3 people. The principal said my application was really good and I interviewed very well, though a few of my responses lacked a little substance. Fair call. He said my passion really stood out and my emotional intelligence was well beyond my years. But the person who got it had like 9 years experience in schools and the person who was second similarly had more experience. Instead of that information being comforting, it only made me more upset; how will I ever get the experience if I can’t get the jobs to get the experience?!
I know that it was a really great, valuable experience and that I tried my best and did well, but it just doesn’t feel like enough. I’m guttered. I really wanted the job; I was so excited about it and about potentially moving to Melbourne soon.
All I want to do is cry and cry and cry and go home and be alone and never leave my bed. Unfortunately I still have 3 hours left at work. Over it.
